A Brief Ponder of Life's Conundrums: The Sequel

After pondering it for a minute or two I came to the conclusion that writing the original "A Brief Ponder of Life's Conundrums" was by far the most fun and enjoyable, so I have so graciously decided to embark on this endeavor for the second time...

1. I have so much Coca-Cola paraphernalia in my house. Why is that? It's very strange.

2. What is this peculiar taste that is in my mouth currently?

3. Why was Where the Wild Things Are so amazing?

4. How come they call them apartments if they are all stuck together?

5. Why does "fat chance" and "slim chance" mean the same thing? They're totally opposite.

6. How come there is so many fonts? It's overwhelming to the max!

7. Why is there a boring Documentary on the TV right now?

8. The color Blue, why does it rock so much?

9. How come Diet Coke is an incredibly delicious miracle elixir?

10. Why are Otters so incredibly cute?

11. Woah. I just looked up at the TV and an Otter was on screen. How come that amazing coincidence happened?

12. When will Christmas be here? Very soon I hope.

13. An Anteater is now on-screen. Why are they so freaky looking?

And now, you wonderful, surreptitious people, I shall so chivalrously try to provide some answers...

1. I'm not sure why but I kinda love it.

2. Hmmm... I think it's Tofu Bacon.

3. Due to the combined talent of Spike Jonze, Dave Eggers, Maurice Sendak, and that incredibly talented little boy, Max Records.

4. There is probably some explanation that probably doesn't make much sense. Probably, probably, probably.

5. I have no idea and I bet there is a fat and slim chance that I will never find out.

6. Well that has to do with a major, nefarious font conspiracy that the font companies are behind, but that's a story for another day.

7. Because I am not in control of the clicker.

8. Because it is beautiful. And because Yellow and Orange suck so much.

9. I don't know but I want to go drink some right now.

10. No particular reason but I really wish I had one as a pet.

11. It was pretty amazingly freaky. I hope it happens again some time.

12. This one, I actually have a good answer to. December 25th. I hope it brings it's friend the cold with it!

13. Due to their incredibly long nose and extremely strange eating habits.

And once again, I have answered all the mysteries of life. I hope there's gonna be a threequel!